What
would the penalty of his insurrection be? He knew Dr. Maitland far
too well to expect mercy, nor did he wish it. He was too proud for
that. He had disobeyed the rules of the school, and he must now bear
the punishment, be it what it would. The thought of holding back the
facts had never entered his mind. Indolent he sometimes was even to
laziness but never within his memory had he been dishonest. So he
had fearlessly told the truth, and despite the calamity it
threatened he found himself the happier for telling it. Whether it
would mean expulsion from Colversham he did not know; probably it
would.
To think of leaving Colversham, the place he loved so much! And in
disgrace, too. What would the other boys say? And his father?
Van shrank at the thought of telling his father.
Mr. Blake was a severe man who, like Dr. Maitland, would not gloss
over the affair either by tolerance or sympathy. He would be angry,
and he would have the right to be. Van admitted that. As he looked
back on his school days he realized for the first time how indulgent
his father had been; he had denied his son no reasonable wish,
simply asking in return that the boy express his gratitude by
studiousness and obedience. Van flushed as with vividness it came to
his consciousness that he had repaid his father's goodness with
neither of these things. He had studied just as little as was
possible, and in place of appreciation he had rendered nothing but
disgrace.
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