'
"At that he blew something into my face that sickened me with feelings
of discouragement and dejection. Really, I felt worse than I did before
ever I crossed the Jordan. I felt faint and sad.
"'Probably you have failed somewhere! More than likely Immanuel has cast
you off, and some giant will carry you out of the land. You are a failure.
That is all there is to it.' And with this he struck me a hard blow that
seemed to land right on my heart. I fainted and fell.
"After this, Giant Bad Feelings visited me every day. He had the power,
it seemed, to make me feel just as he desired. At times he would throw
over me feelings that imitated envy, anger, and such like. When Bad
Feelings would shroud me with ingratitude to Immanuel, then he would
turn around and beat me for the ingratitude just as though the feelings
were my own. And really it was here that Giant Bad Feelings deceived me.
He had manufactured these feelings himself and, on encountering me, would
lay them upon me, all the while insinuating that they were my very own.
He would bring bad words to my mind, bad thoughts, ugly pictures and
ideas that my soul and mind revolted against. He would deftly cause it all
to seem as though it came from my heart.
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