All of this should and must be cut off shortly by
your honoring your own word and refusing to be confused about it. It can
be ended by gathering yourself in hand in coming to a real, final
conclusion in favor of your sanctification. If you are as consecrated
as you know how to consecrate, then that should be sufficient. In that
case, all you lack is to bring the affair to a point, a conclusion, and
give it all over to God, and let that be the end of it.
Now that you are ready to make this final decision, it will be worth
while for you to examine your consecration. Are there any idols to which
your affections fondly cling? Is it a delight to do something for Christ
in behalf of others? Does it seem hard for you to give of your money to
the blessed cause? Is prayer a burden? Are you really all the Lord's?
Do not make the mistake of thinking a good disposition toward Jesus is
consecration. To consecrate means to come definitely to the point of
yielding all up to Christ once forever.
Possibly one reason for your feeling of unreality is because you can not
see God and can not hear Him say, "I receive you." If God could be right
before you as a visible person while you knelt and gave yourself to Him,
you might think your experience more real.
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